Monday, May 7, 2012

Well Being

The sense of well being has totally escaped from my reality,even after 2 months totally clean.The natural reward feelings have not returned as well,leaving me literally nothing but a zombie .The only emotions I do possess are anger,despair and hopelessness.My mind is constantly trying to manipulate any obstacle I encounter as a reason to use,it is so profound.I have come to understand that the mind is not one acting controller but many different subsystems all working on their own and totally ignorant of any other physical system. Wow,I might think about my thoughts too much but so far trying to reason with myself has been the only way I have accomplished anything or remained calm.
I have read and been told that the brain may take up to a year to heal and work properly again.If I can maintain for a year I can say that no amount of mental trauma is insurmountable.